WHAT IS THIS.

I've watched a lot of weird movies in my time. Around the Winfrey house, that's basically what we do for fun. What I'm saying is, I might be easily amused, but I'm not easily surprised. Yet when I watched the trailer for this Japanese horror film that Netflix suggested to me, all I could think was, "What the fuck is this?" I'm not the one studying films in school, though. Have you heard of or seen this movie?

At first I was like, "Thanks but no thanks, Netflix." Now I am like, "How soon can you ship this to me?" Bonus points for the wackadoo sitcom intro stuck in the middle of this trailer. What's the deal with the trippy 60's music? What's the deal with the cat painting that looks like the work of a schizophrenic? What's the deal with this movie? I intend to find out, but I'll probably wait until Lexie's home.

Those were different times.

This movie got a PG rating. I don't think a movie can get a PG rating if it even has "blood" in the title today. Also, is this the best narrator in the history of movie trailers? I think so.

Review Time

I wrote out a review of House of the Devil, but I wasn't feeling it, so I'll just tell you that you should definitely see it. All the reviews you have read have been true. It's an amazing film and I hope that it does really well.

House of the Devil

We love horror movies here at The Talented Winfrey Family. You probably know that, and you probably do too. Who doesn't? Kerry and I have sat through some real stinkers (I'm looking at you Let's Scare Jessica To Death) but we've also found some awesome movies (that's right Pieces). Anyway, the reason I'm saying this is because often times, when we're watching these movies, Kerry will ask, "Why don't they make movies like this anymore?" because she's someone's grandparent. Now there's House of the Devil, which looks like a great homage to these movies without being annoying and campy.

Seriously, this movie looks great, and I've heard a ton of good reviews. You can rent it right now on Amazon iF yOu DaRe!!!

Also, who's excited about Trick 'r Treat?

Hey guys. I saw a movie.

I went and saw Paranormal Activity last night....with this lady.

Anyway, it was a sold out midnight showing, and it was totally bananas. It was so much fun! I would definitely recommend it. There were a few people that didn't like it. The couple walking out in front of us were saying, "Like, that would scare me if I were in seventh grade. Yeah, it creeped me out a little bit." There was also a comic-book-guy type screaming something like, "Give me Saw V, Saw VI, Saw VII anyday!" I guess he didn't like it either. Other than that though, everyone was super into it, including that lady up there. There were a lot of whispers of, "holy shit" and "fuck that". Winfrey seal of approval.

Winfrey's Excited.

This guy is so excited about this news. Am I the only one? Why does everyone hate this idea so much. I could understand if they had Rob Zombie directing it, but David Gordon Green is so good! I guess not everyone likes him. Whatever happens, this is going to be a totally interesting and original movie. Winfrey out.

The Bagheads (that's what it was called, right?)

Since I'm one of those Women Who Love Horror Films, I finally (at Alex's urging) watched Baghead last weekend. I know he already posted this trailer at least once, but here it is again. Watch it! Really!

Except don't watch it if you're going to a cabin in the middle of the woods in Kentucky that weekend. I really can't believe Alex allowed me to watch it on Friday night, knowing full well that we were leaving Saturday on our trip. I spent the whole weekend worrying about Bagheads. And Alex (of course) tried to scare me but I was on the lookout the whole weekend so it didn't work. I had to watch for Bagheads, you know?
Another reason to watch this movie is that it stars Jon Lovitz Baby a.k.a. one of the main actors. He's the one who looks like Jon Lovitz as a baby.

I Have Some Problems With Entertainment Weekly

Alex and I have long had a love/hate relationship with Entertainment Weekly. Mostly we feel this ambivalence about head film writer Owen Gleiberman, a.k.a. The Gleibs. He is merciless. He hates everything we love (comedy, horror) and usually only gives As to children's films (except for that time he hated Beverly Hills Chihuahua because it needed "more interesting chihuahuas."). But we still care what he thinks. In that way, he's a lot like an abusive boyfriend. We just keep coming back to him.
But Entertainment Weekly really cheesed me off the last couple of weeks. First, they had an article about how there were so many female directors. Seriously. That was the whole article. Women be directin'! But then, oh then, they dared to publish an article called "Horror Films...(the title is okay so far, in case you were wondering)...and the Women who Love Them!" The article was about, you guessed it, how women like horror films, and how this is so shocking, and what we never expected this it's all so confusing I thought they liked Sex and the City whaaaat? I can't type any verbatim quotes from the article because I already barfed all over it, but I can tell you about it. Here were the people they chose to interview for this really well researched article:
1. Diablo Cody, because she wrote a Megan Fox movie that, honestly, looks a little more action-y than horror-y to me.
2. Vera Farmiga, because she's in the Orphan (ugh) and I guess that qualifies her?
3. Sam Raimi. I love Sam Raimi as much as the next girl (I mean, way more than the next girl), but why did they interview him for this? Because he cast a female lead in his last film? I don't know.

So Diablo Cody did her usual thing (talked about herself whenever she was asked a question), Vera Farmiga gave some psychobabble bullshit answer ("Women are just more visceral and they like the excitement of being scared") and Sam Raimi was like, "Sorry, I'm too busy for this, I have to go direct another good movie."
Here were Entertainment Weekly's two reasons why women go see horror films:
1. There are often female leads, and women like to see other women beat the odds and be the last one standing. And...
2. Because they like to cuddle! With their boyfriends!

No, Entertainment Weekly. Just no. Here's an idea. Stop treating women like they're some sort of alien species. Why are you so surprised that women like horror films? What SHOULD we like? Matthew McCounaghey (whatever) movies only come out so often, okay? Maybe, and I'm sure this is shocking, women like horror films for the same reasons men do. Maybe it's just because they're fun, and because people in general enjoy getting a little rush of adrenaline when they are actually in a completely safe environment. You can try to reason it away with Psych 101 level bullshit all you want, but I like watching scary movies because I LIKE THEM. And as far as the whole cuddling thing goes, H. won't watch scary movies with me so I watch them with Alex (and sometimes Chase). Not a lot of cuddling goes on.
I will continue hating Entertainment Weekly until tomorrow when we get a new issue. I love Entertainment Weekly!

Film Review, Kind of

Let's talk about horror films for a moment. Do you love horror films? Of course you do. I mean, duh. If you don't, get away from here. You aren't welcome. Winfreys saw Drag Me to Hell this weekend, and we loved it. One of us saw it by himself, and the other one had to drag her boyfriend to see it (try to figure out which one was me! I included some helpful context clues). One of the things that Alex and I noticed about DMTH was that it isn't like a lot of horrible new scary movies. Par example:
1. No shitty nu-metal soundtrack.
2. It was actually nice to look at, unlike a lot of new scary movies that are all grey and brown.
Of course this movie reminded me of Evil Dead, but it reminded me a lot more of Suspiria. Not just because the opening scene took place in, like, some giant ballroom place. It has a female lead, nice colors, interesting music. Agree/disagree?
All of this leads me to this. Have you ever wanted to know what Edgar Wright thinks of the American trailer for Suspiria? Probably not, but this is kind of a neat concept. I love trailers.