Prepare to Cringe

When I in the 2nd grade, my family watched a lot of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. It's the kind of show my dad is into. I remember Dr. Quinn being mostly about medicine, as the title suggests. People got sick and she cured them, right? WRONG. This is a show about the hot, awkward love-making between Dr. Quinn and part Native-American (I think) macho man Sully. Recently when I was at my parents, Chase and I caught an episode of DQMW and I was totally floored by the amount of uncomfortable sex! There are few things I find less attractive than these two going at it, but I knew someone would have some Youtube montages. Duh. There are so, so, many Youtube montages.
Here's one of the worst/best, set to one of my absolute least favorite soft rock work songs.

Work Songs I Like

I'm starting a new blog series called "Work Songs I Like." As you probably know, I have to listen to soft rock at work. This is both a curse and a blessing. A curse because this station has a criminally small rotation, plays only the worst new music, and repeats, like, the same five commercials all day. A blessing because...okay, it is not actually a blessing! It's very rare that I actually hear a song I like. Sometimes I just have to take what I can get, and say to myself, "This John Waite song isn't so bad after all." I've grown to love this song, but it's sort of a prison love where I know I'm stuck with it so I have to learn to live with it. This video is super weird. Like, John Waite looks like he should be singing a different kind of music, and also what is with that girl?

Sad Christmas Songs

As I've mentioned many a time, I love a good Sad Christmas Song. Barely any of my favorite songs, Christmas or otherwise, are happy. I guess my inner pessimist expresses herself through SONG! (Cue jazz hands)
A couple of my favorite Sad Christmas Songs actually aren't Christmas-specific. They're more Sad Winter Songs. The first, Same Old Lang Syne by Dan Fogelberg, is clearly more of a Sad New Year's Song. This song kind of gives me the warm fuzzies, because one of the first things my best friend and I bonded over was our shared, age-inappropriate love of Dan Fogelberg. Seriously, what were 14 year olds doing listening to sappy 70s soft rock? Either way, this song has actually made me tear up on occasion. Just being real (need I remind you the first rule of Winfrey Fight Club is no frontin'?). I'm pretty sure this song is still aimed at people much older than I am, but it hits me in a much different way now. The last couple of lines have a simplistic poetry about them that I really enjoy.
Also, I know a lot of people that hate this song. You will probably be one of them!

While River by Joni Mitchell may mention Christmas, I wouldn't call it a Christmas song. It's more of a "I'm so screwed up that I drove away the man that loved me and now I feel like skating away even though everyone else is happy" song. I really love this song.

The sparse instrumentation and the plain sorrow in Joni's voice make this song extremely emotionally affecting. You know what would be great? If you added in a shit ton of instruments and had Barry Manilow do HIS spin on it! The song starts at about 1:30.

I don't think Barry Manilow had malicious intentions. I mean, I of all people understand the appeal of Manilow. This song, though, is truly terrible. Just hearing him sing lyrics like, "I'm gonna make a lot of money and I'm gonna quit this crazy scene," is like WHAT. What crazy scene? Look at all those middle aged ladies in the audience! That scene is the complete OPPOSITE of crazy. That scene is like a reasonably pleated pair of slacks.
Naturally, the radio station I have to listen to at work plays the Barry version and not the Joni original. I will never understand this world.

Pullman/Lynch

Sometimes it is just good to know that you aren't the only one.
Julie Klausner has a weird crush on Bill Pullman, too! I've been kind of wanting to rewatch Lost Highway, but Alex put a temporary moratorium on watching David Lynch films. The reason? He's taking an ENTIRE CLASS on David Lynch next quarter. Color me jealous.

Snow Day Tunes Part 2

I find myself thinking of Christmas music as a static thing. For the most part, I listen to the same songs year after year. This year, Papa Winfrey reminded me that it doesn't have to be that way. Why not buy, like, 10 new Christmas albums in some sort of Christmas music binge? He is particularly fond of Susan Boyle, in case you wondered.
This year I "discovered" some new Christmas music that isn't actually new at all. Lexie accidentally stumbled across a Beach Boys Christmas album that we'd never heard, and I immediately fell in love with this song, Child of Winter. Apparently it was a single that never really caught on. I can't imagine why. The goofy spoken word interlude is my favorite.


Another favorite that I just found out about: Hard Candy Christmas by Dolly Parton. Sad Christmas Music is my favorite Christmas music subgenre.

Snow Day Tunes Part 1

I don't know about you guys, but I really enjoyed a snow day today. It was Sunday, so it wasn't like I would've had to work anyway, but I pretended I was taking the day off. I ate leftover meatloaf, made myself some chamomile tea, did a little cleaning, did some sewing, read a book, and listened to Christmas music. Christmas music has to be the best part about Christmas, right? My favorite Christmas song, as you probably already know, is Last Christmas, but as far as traditional songs go, it's pretty hard to beat Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. And when it's performed by She & Him (& Conan)? Impossible to resist!

Something I Like.

There's a very specific type of dancing that always makes me laugh AND always makes me jealous. Sure, I can dance, but I can't dance like this. Well, it's a long break. I'll have some time to practice.

Are we going to watch Fatso over break?

Of course we are.

This trailer gives a lot away. I almost feel like we don't even need to watch this movie anymore. That Dom DeLuise silhouette at the end is pretty hot, though.

Dermot McDermott

Alex and I laughed so hard at this when we first read it. This is my way of saying that soon Alex will be home and we'll all be able to laugh at more dumb jokes in person! Unfortunately the blog will be pretty slow for a month or so.

Can't Stop

I can't get enough of this song.

Totally NSFW

Check this website out if you want some laughs. It's a photography website, but they posted samples of their work. The category that I linked to is "couples (nude)", which is hilarious! A lot of these pictures are like, "Do they know they're not wearing clothes?" and other pictures are like, "Is it comfortable to lay like that?" and then there's one picture that's like, "That guy has a huge penis." Now you're interested, right? Anyway, who would want these? They're so terrible! It's like the kept all the awkwardness of normal photos but also took all the clothes of normal photos.

I'm so excited!

This Saturday I'm going to go see these guys. Get pumped up.

"I showed it to my dad and he thought it was a very funny goof and a spoof."

"I'm gonna be lookin' at ya nude."

and also "P'Kard"

Everyone should come with me! It's gonna be a blast!

You Watched This, Right?

Then watch it again! I'm talking about the latest episode of Bestie x Bestie, duh. I laughed out loud multiple times. I actually really, really hate the use of the word retarded as a pejorative, not because I'm particularly PC but because it's incredibly hurtful. That being said, lots of comedians I like and many of my best friends use the word all the time, so whatever. This is really funny, so what are you going to do?

Another Song I Love

I've written before about my love of John Legend, but I've never mentioned my love of the song "Everybody Knows." I really love this song, but I only remembered it because it shares a title with a Ryan Adams song. I am only a little ashamed to mention that for awhile, I used to listen to this song multiple times a day. Alex can keep posting about all those cool indie bands he listens to, and I'll just let you know about all the pop songs I listen to.

Little known fact: Winfreys love Drake. Winfreys don't really have an opinion on Rhianna (at least, this Winfrey doesn't), but ever since I heard the song "What's My Name" on SNL, I haven't been able to get it out of my head. For some reason, it's like impossible to find a decent version of that performance online, but the actual video just came out and guess what? Drake, that's what!

I really like the live SNL version much more because it featured some jangly guitars that reminded me of Shakira's "She Wolf," but this is great because you can see Rhianna's insane outfit. Like, are those thigh-highs worn with denim shorts? I seriously don't understand. Also, every word out of Drake's mouth is ridiculous, like usual. I love him.

Socks

This post doesn't really have a "point." It's just something I love there. There's no video or audio, and it doesn't relate to any recent pop cultural happenings. I just feel the need to get the word out about something near and dear to my heart: fuzzy socks.
Fuzzy socks (also called slipper socks) are what I refer to as a "Grandma Gift." Last year, I'm pretty sure I got socks from both of my grandmothers and also Mom. The first time I got a pair of these (in college), I was all, "What am I going to do with these comedically fuzzy socks? They won't fit in a shoe." And they won't! I've tried to cram them into my flats and they look like Muppet feet. But once I slipped these babies on my feet I was sold.

The first pair I got were called "Socks to Stay Home In," and I remember Dan and I laughed so much at how pathetic that sounded. It's all very "Single-40-Year-Old-With-Cats," you know? Oh, you know. At first when I wore them, I was all, "Haha, you guys, these socks sure are silly!" But guess what? Those socks are comfortable. After a long winter day, nothing feels as good as slipping on your Socks to Stay Home In. Of course, this also entails admitting to yourself that you aren't leaving the house for the rest of the evening and you'll likely just be watching episodes of This American Life on Netflix, but let's face it. You were going to do that anyway.

Tig Notaro

We all love Tig Notaro, right? Of course we do. Who doesn't? She had a really nice interview on the WTF podcast a while back. I really just wanted to post these two bits. The first one is great, because it capitalizes on one of my favorite things: the word "titties". (Do you really need any more evidence?)



And this is just really solid.

Field Trip.

Can we go see this guy perform? He seems to know what he's talking about.

How to Write Jokes: Stand-Up Comedy Tips -- powered by eHow.com

Seriously

I'm really just trying to get that Halloween video off the page. Seriously. It won't stop. I've been listening to this song on repeat for the last couple days, and I found this nice video of Mike Long dancing to it. How nice! If you're not familiar with Mike Long (Dipsetmuthafucka) then check him out, but let's get real. It's 2010. Everyone knows about this.

This MUST be the Place! from Mike Long on Vimeo.

Christopher Cross

I will admit that I'm only a casual fan of 30 Rock. Yes, whenever I watch it I love it, but also I always feel like I'm not the target audience. I mean, I earnestly love the Midwest a little TOO much. Regardless, this song from the upcoming 30 Rock soundtrack is GREAT! Clearly there are echoes of "Arthur's Theme" going on here. I predict Alex will love this one. You can download it on Pitchfork.

Love this one

I admit, I initially liked this song because I thought it was funny. I mean, this song is Dir-tay. It was a novelty thing. Of course, I like Dan Deacon, so that's why I originally listened to it, but it was mostly a "I can't believe she said that!" kind of thing. Now, I legitimately love this song. I listen to it on the reg. I guess I finally realized how much it applies to my own life.

Because this blog is a safe space...

..I will admit to something. I LOVE this song.

Fun fact: Whenever Papa Winfrey tries to whistle "Last Christmas," it always somehow morphs into this song. It drives Mama Winfrey bonkers.

This song

This is one of those songs I never get tired of. I actually heard the remix before I heard the original, which is fine because the remix is infinitely better. I've been listening to this song pretty consistently all year.

It's fun to sing along with if you know what he's saying. If you don't, you might be like my GF and think certain lyrics are, "Four men and a dog!" and "Chuzza wuzza wuzza lowwww." Either way you win.

I Need This in My Life

Burt Reynolds being Burt Reynolds, Liza Minelli in sequins and fur, angry police department scenes...I love everything about this.

Halloween, you dicks.

Seriously? Just drop it. Dunking for apples, I mean, I can find no fault in that. Dunk away. But Halloween? Come on, now.

So glad...

...that people don't like songs about monsters dancing as much as they used to.

So fucking scary

It's Halloween time. So...horror movies? I'm taking a class on horror movies right now, so I haven't been watching a lot outside of class, which is a damn shame. I figured, since Kerry was doing her own thang over there, I would show you a scene that I really like from not so great of a movie. Look, I watched Exorcist III so you don't have to. Trust me, this is the scene that's important.

One youtube comment said it best: "Y does that fuck me up every time!?!"

Scary.

The soft rock is back at work. Actually, the soft rock's BEEN back for a few months. The playlist hasn't changed much from last year. Hall and Oates songs are, unfortunately, few and far between. Instead, I get weird songs like THIS one, which I hear almost every day. I really do think this is one of the worst songs I've ever heard. At the end, she basically just makes guttural noises for a couple of minutes. Enjoy (you will not enjoy).

A youtube commenter said: "Ugh, I feel like I'm being dragged around the mall by my parents and it's 1993." WELL SAID!

Still Halloween themed...

...because it's scary how much I love this! Seriously, this goes on for SO LONG.

I guess we need to see this movie now, because what just happened?

Scary.

It's Halloween week on TTWF! Why? Because I said it is. Also, look at the calendar, dummy.
If someone asked me to name the scariest movie I've ever seen, I'd have a hard time coming up with an answer. I've seen so many scary movies, and I've been pretty scared by some that aren't even any good. But if someone asked me to name the scariest TV show...that's easy. Twin Peaks.
Twin Peaks didn't just creep me out, it actually scared me. There are a few scenes that really put me over the edge, and almost all of them involve the killer BOB. Sometimes when I'm feeling really freaked out, I have to watch Youtube videos of the actor who played BOB, Frank Silva, to show myself that he was a normal, seemingly happy man. Still though...I watched this scene last night and immediately regretted it. Maybe don't watch it, or maybe do. I honestly have no idea if this is scary outside of the context of the show. I have a feeling that it's a combination of the perspective and the fear I already have of this character.

HOLY MOLY. If you haven't yet seen Twin Peaks, what are you waiting for? It's 2010! You are so behind! The best way to describe it is this: It's like Gilmore Girls and Northern Exposure, but with a murder and really scary and only funny less than half the time. I guess I just mean it's set in a small town. Also, fun fact: Zooey Deschanel's mom, Rashida Jones's mom, and Amber Tamblyn's dad are all in Twin Peaks.

Best Costume

Alex and I are pretty excited about Halloween. Mostly we're excited about our costumes (and seeing other people's costumes). One of us is going as a woodland creature, and one of us is going as the iconic titular character from a beloved 1980's cross dressing film. Basically, we're each being true to our personalities. Chase hasn't yet picked a costume and told me he just wants to get a fake mustache, which means he is also staying true to himself (trying to put in the least amount of time/effort possible). I bet he ends up going as a banana again. There's always money in the banana suit, you guys.
A lot of entertainment websites are doing "Best TV Halloween Costume" lists. Clearly, the list of Best TV Halloween Costumes begins and ends here, with Bill Haverchuck's Bionic Woman costume.

This is simultaneously my favorite (those costumes!) and least favorite (Lindsay reminds me WAY too much of myself in high school) episode of Freaks and Geeks.

I'm Just Saying...

Zach Galifianakis is my dream dude.

On Comedy Death Ray, Why Zach Galifianakis Will Always Be the Best, and Kind of a Feminist Rant

We're all listening to Comedy Death Ray, right? I know I use the phrase "do yourself a favor" a lot, but REALLY, you will be DOING YOURSELF A FAVOR if you just start listening to this. It will be a source of pure joy for you. This week's episode is especially good because it stars (stars? I think I mean features but unfortunately I don't know what a backspace key is and I just have to keep going) Zach Galifianakis. Also, Andrew Lloyd Weber makes an appearance! Zach is so great because he always manages to come across as a very genuine human being. MOST IMPORTANTLY: Paul F. Tompkins (as ALW) makes a great Hangover zinger and everyone laughs. See? Zach Galifianakis also thinks that movie was sexist. You weren't the only one!
He also mentions briefly (without going into detail, because he is a classy gentleman) that he was frustrated with a movie he's currently working on. Some website thinks it's because of Mel Gibson. It makes me unreasonably happy that Zach Galifianakis is upset by this. I mean, okay, I enjoyed The Hangover...but almost completely because of Zach's part. It wasn't enough for the movie to be INSANELY sexist, it also had to have a cameo by a CONVICTED RAPIST. From Feministe:
"I believe that The Hangover is a special kind of awful, and here’s why: The Hangover doesn’t just contribute another small niblet of turd to the enormous pile of shit that is rape culture with its celebration of men’s narcissism, disregard for the basic humanity of women, slut-shaming, and joyful exaltation of the dudebro bond above any relationship with icky girls. No, The Hangover goes above and beyond. It includes a superfun cameo by an actual rapist."
You know what's embarrassing? When I saw this movie, I didn't even know Mike Tyson was a rapist. How could I not know that? Maybe because I live in a culture where rape is regarded as basically no big deal, where movies like this tell you that it's all some big joke. I used to just feel uneasy with the casual misogyny in this movie, but the fact that it's so casual is what makes it so terrible. Now it doesn't just makes me uneasy, it makes me feel sad and angry. What this movie says to women is: Your happiness doesn't matter, your opinion doesn't matter, you don't matter. And now they want us to laugh along with a guy that hit and threatened to kill his wife? Honestly, it's fucking sickening. There's no way I'm seeing this movie.

On a happier note? Zach's website. You're welcome.

The best.

Twin Sister

I've been feeling this song lately. I've been needing new music for a while, and I've been locked in a serious internal battle over whether to pirate the new Walkmen album or wait until I have money/Christmas-Birthday-time to get it. Yeah, I'm going to just wait. I have a copy of all of their other albums, attained legally of course. They're one of my favorite artists. Sure, I'll just wait. In the mean time, I'll listen to this song. Twin Sister is pretty good. I'd recommend checking them out. This is definitely the best song on the EP though.

Funny Video

Kerry's been on my case. Yeah, I haven't been updating regularly. Ya got me. Guess what, people! I've been a busy boy for the last few weeks. You know what they say: Time is a valuable thing. Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings. Anyway, I figured I would pop in here and show you a video that I liked. Brent Weinbach's a funny dude.

Stay Sweet,

Alex

Soft Pianist - watch more funny videos

Stoltzin' Around

Eric Stoltz has certainly been in the news recently! But he's been in my head (and my heart) for a long, long time. For some reason that I don't understand, a lot of people seem to not take Eric Stoltz seriously. Not this girl. He has an extremely earnest delivery that you can't fake, with a slightly creepy edge that makes all of his characters seem like they've got a secret life. I think that if his career ever takes a turn for the weirder and he ends up doing Lifetime movies, he'd be really good at playing a psychopathic boyfriend (like maybe if there's ever a remake of this one).
All this Stoltz-talk inspired me to think about my favorite Stoltz-roles. Here are three:

Kicking and Screaming:
If you haven't seen Kicking and Screaming yet, please, just stop whatever you're doing and watch it. Especially if you've graduated from college with a degree in the humanities. You're going to love it, and Eric Stoltz is the best part. Here he is in a a book club.

Little Women:
Forget Laurie, it's all about Mr. Brooks. Just kidding, Laurie's the best. But Eric Stoltz at least makes Mr. Brooks interesting and weird. He's in the beginning of the trailer, sayin' something creepy, as you'd expect. Also, this trailer is not very good! This was right around the time that Eric Stoltz was suffering from a little disease called Stoltz bloat. Don't worry, though, because he bounced back and he's looking better than ever.


And the number one Eric Stoltz role: Some Kind of Wonderful!
This is a classic movie. It's like Pretty in Pink, but with a happy ending, and also not as good. But still good! Loralei Gilmore made a reference to this movie in an episode of Gilmore Girls I may have watched with friends this weekend. Eric Stoltz takes his dream girl on a dream date that is one part awesome and 15 parts totally weird. Eric Stoltz does a very good, "But I'm 18, Dad! WHEN IS IT MY LIFE????" Coincidentally, a book club is mentioned!

V. Funny

Did anyone else here read Bridget Jones's Diary? No? Just me, then? Well, okay. I actually really enjoyed that book, but I did not enjoy all the annoying slang. One of the things I hated most was how Bridget would abbreviate "very" as "v," as in "Cat and Girl is v. good." Even though I hate it, I always think it (but never say it because barf).
If you haven't read Cat and Girl, do yourself a favor! Here's one that mentions Richard Brautigan, because he is on my mind lately. Anyway, the point of this is to show you these great Jonathan Franzen stickers. So good.

Hey Arnold!

While in New York this weekend, I realized that even though I've read lots of books and watched lots of movies set in New York, my main two points of reference are The Muppets Take Manhattan and Hey Arnold.
We went to the aquarium while we were there and, while it was awesome, it was not INSIDE A GIANT WHALE like the aquarium in Hey Arnold. I'm sorry, where is the giant whale aquarium? Is that not even real? Anyway, here's the aquarium episode.

Also, speaking of the Muppets and Manhattan, I found this.

WTF?

Now hold on. Let's look at the title of the post. I know what you're thinking. "Alex, the implied swearing is uncharacteristic of you. Also, are you a douche now?" No. I'm not. I just wanted to make a post about one of my new favorite podcasts. That's right. WTF With Marc Maron. Now I know, I'm kind of late on this one. Everyone listens to this thing, right? Actually, wrong. In fact, I know that our primary reader, Kerry (also primary contributor), does not listen to this podcast. Listen to it, Kerry.

Kerry and I saw Marc Maron perform as part of the Stand Uppity tour with Andy Kindler and Winfrey family fav Eugene Mirman. I'll admit, I wasn't familiar with Marc Maron before the show, but his performance was good! So I found out about his podcast shortly after this and I gave it the ol' download. For some reason, at the time, I was not feelin' it. So I had a few episodes that sat in my iTunes for a year or two.

I just recently discovered it, and I've been burning through episodes. It's so good. Seriously, give it a listen. He's really open about everything in his life, and he talks about himself a lot, which is what I think originally turned me off from it. His guests are also really open. As much as I love Comedy Death Ray Radio (a LOT), those guys are always crackin' funnies! Scott Aukerman was on WTF and he hardly cracked any funnies. It was just a really good interview! The Judd Apatow episode is one of the best interviews I've heard. It's all so good.

Make sure you check out the Bob Odenkirk interview. If I find an interview with him, I straight up stop what I'm doing and listen to it/read it. That guy is my hero. Check it out you guys, seriously.

Bought it.

I've been watching Gilmore Girls and letting my emotions get the best of me and, well, I'll just give you a little hint as to what I bought on iTunes.

That's right. I bought a Sam Phillips album, so now I can annoy Alex with all the strummy "lalala" songs. Maybe someday I'll make a post about my deep connection to Gilmore Girls and how this show has really nursed me through some difficult times in my life. And maybe someday I'll scrape together the money for therapy so I can get over using a television show as an emotional crutch! Haha. You're funny, Winfrey.

Just a Really Good Impression

I missed SNL's season premiere last night because I was on vacation. Don't get me wrong; I love having better things to do on a Saturday night than watch television. Still, though, I wanted to see how the new cast members did. Judging by this clip, AWESOME! I know sometimes impressions aren't "ccol" or whatever the kids are saying these days, but I really love a spot-on impresison. I have simple tastes.

Sufjan Stevens

Did you guys get the All Delighted People EP? If not, you should at least download the title track. It's over 11 minutes long! Seriously, just listen to it. Sufjan Stevens has been rockin' it lately.

Freedom!

I gave in. I checked out Freedom from the library. I am extremely sensitive to hype; that's why I read Twilight (well, that AND my masochistic nature AND my love of making fun of things AND the fact that it was cheap). I just could not resist Freedom after hearing about it everywhere. Will I actually read it? Probably not. But I will at least open it.
I think Jonathan Franzen is a remarkable author (I'm really going out on a limb here by asserting an unusual opinion, I know), but come on...Freedom is a TERRIBLE title. Titling my stories was the thing I sucked the most at in my workshops. Almost every critique would be like, "Um, your title? Not doing it for me." So I understand, Franzen. I get it. Titles are hard. But couldn't you have come up with something that didn't make me think of two George Michael songs?


On second thought, never mind! Those are great songs. Keep up the good title work.

This One's For the Lexies

Alex is always all, "Ugh, grad students." And with good reason. He's talking, of course, about a very specific type of grad student...not someone studying, say, physics, microbiology, or anything with a practical application. Humanities grad students. Film grad students. Y'all know what I'm talking about, and so does television!

Sorry about that last post, guys.

This better?

Man. This video.

I saw this video a while ago, and I'd been meaning to post about it. It's one of those videos that you never forget. It's also one of the few music videos that has actually scared me. It is directed by Eric Wareheim (and Fatal Farm worked on it!), which is strange. I guess I never really knew what he was capable of because of what he does with Tim and Eric and most of his other videos, but man. This is something. Seriously, watch it.


It looks so good. And it is so much more than just a shock I think. I can't explain it, but I know that I like it. There are parts of Tim and Eric that are creepy, and this video has something that I can't explain that I love in scary movies. What I'm saying is, Eric Wareheim, direct a horror film. Just think on it.

Jenny and Johnny

Not a super exciting update, but I seriously can't stop listening to this song. The whole album is good, but this song is really somethin' special. Recommended if you like She & Him, but wish they were less poppy/more jangly and also more about sex.

Going the Distance

It's no secret that I love romantic comedies. I'm pretty sure I've started other blog posts with that exact sentence, so it's also no secret that I know it's not a secret. Ever since I saw the trailer for Going the Distance, I knew I had to see it as soon as possible. Rarely do movies come out that are so made for me.

Firstly and most importantly, I LOVE Drew Barrymore. I love everything about her. Mostly I love that, no matter what movie she's in, it seems like she picked out her own wardrobe. Her clothes are so wacky! She dresses like a five year old whose mother is like, "I'm tired, wear what you want" and so she just piles on the sparkle and camo with stripes or whatever.
All of the other things I love about this movie are summed up really well in Owen Gleiberman's EW review, which you can read here if you so wish. I agreed wholeheartedly with the Gleibs (as I do about half the time) when he wrote this:

Going the Distance is a light and tasty morsel of a romantic comedy in which two smart, funny, and basically sweet people try to conduct a cross-country relationship. The movie, which sounds like it was spun out of an advice column, is very high-concept, except that it has a gently authentic tone, a flavor rooted in its affection for the shrewd innocence of the 1980s. For the first 15 minutes or so, I actually wondered if it was set in the '80s....After two love montages set to the Cure's ''Just Like Heaven'' and the Pretenders' ''Don't Get Me Wrong,'' I began to think: Between this feel-good '80s jukebox and the fact that no one in the film has yet sent a text message, which year is this?...As it turns out, Going the Distance is quite contemporary, but the wistful retro vibe is no accident. The director, Nanette Burstein, is...out to take us back to an earlier vibe — to a time when pop music was optimistic, and so were movie romances. Erin and Garrett don't just fall into glorified lust. They fall in love because they like each other's company.

He's right; this is VERY much like an 80's romantic comedy. The montages are so montage-y it's almost laughable (I mean, they are dancing on a beach!), which I really like. If you're going to do a montage, you might as well go whole-hog and just do it up right. There's no such thing as a subtle montage, anyway.
Going the Distance was also a lot more realistic than most romantic comedies, which is both a pro and a con. H did not like that the movie's humor skewed blue (this movie is like 95% made up of dick jokes) because he thought it seemed out of place in what he called a "chick flick." I didn't agree though, and not just because I don't use the term chick flick (barf, sorry). The characters talked to each other basically like real people talk to each other. My friends and I spend about 50% of our time talking about sex and the other 50% talking about our jobs, and I think that's pretty typical, so I found those relationships to be accurately depicted. The relationship between Justin Long and Drew Barrymore's characters was believable, too, and not just because Justin Long's character reminded me so much of H (without all the womanizing).
I loved this movie. It has some of my favorite romantic comedy conventions (including the whole "How can this person have their brilliant career AND the love of their life??" conundrum) while also being genuinely funny and believable. And I can't leave out the importance of Jason Sudekis, Charlie Day, Jim Gaffigan, and Mike Birbiglia, who all took the movie to the next level (the next level being the funnier one).
And MOST importantly, one of Drew Barrymore's New York friends is played by Natalie Morales, the girl who plays Aziz's girlfriend on Parks and Rec. H tried to tell me I was wrong but I knew I was right. Suck on that.

This blog post had to happen.

Netflix's recommendations are a mixed bag. Sometimes they recommend categories that are so right ("Romantic Comedies Starring Goldie Hawn" is specific, but very sculpted to my personal interests!), and sometimes they just do not get me. I mean, no, the fact that I like The Devil and Daniel Johnston does not mean that I will watch a documentary on Anorexia. And I definitely don't want to see Did You Hear About the Morgans. But recently, for the first time, Netflix recommended a movie I'd never even heard of but knew I would love. This trailer pretty much describes the plot, whether or not you should see it, and how necessary the movie is.

After I watched this, I had no choice but to make it number one on my queue. I mean, if Ice-T says I must see it, who am I to disagree? I don't know if this movie had to happen...it certainly wasn't well made, and doesn't seem to be particularly passionate. I'm so glad I saw it, though. For one thing, the rapping was terrible. It's all very "Rippity rap rap rap raptastic!" Also, the lead actor is Mario Van Peebles, who is in charge of having the least raptastic name ever as well as not doing any actual rapping, because he was overdubbed by Ice-T (according to IMDB). Ice-T is uncredited in the film and only shows up for one transplendent scene, wherein he prances about stage like a young Mick Jagger. The song "Snack Attack," which I can't find anywhere, makes the movie worth it. I don't want to ruin anything for you, but I'll just say this: someone stuffs their face with cake while everyone raps in some sort of food distribution warehouse.
This doesn't exactly fall under our Dance Movie project (because, after all, it isn't called Dancin'), but it kind of does because there was a significant amount of dancing in this movie. Worth watching!

Here you go.

Even though this blog has fallen into a state of disrepair this summer (example: we used to have two followers and now we only have one. Our readership has decreased by 50% just because of a lack of Alex/any posts at all!), sometimes I see things I just need to post immediately. This Tumblr about Rosanne fashion is one of those things. Yer welcome. Everytime I get upset about what the internet is doing to our lives, something like this comes along and reminds me why it's so important.

Something That Used to Scare Me

If you know me even a little, then you know I have a long, long list of fears, neuroses and anxieties. It's a little comforting to know that even as a child I was irrationally fearful. Take, for example, the one thing that scared me most as a kid (besides tornadoes, fires, rollercoasters and bicycles, that is): the intro to You Can't Do That on Television.

As an adult, I can look at that rationally and see it for what it is: an unashamed Monty Python rip off. But even now just seeing that gives me the nervous jitters. It's a combination of the sickly, washed-out color scheme, the unsettling noises, and the speed of everything. Sometimes at night I would lie awake, just thinking of that guy's terrible face cracking up (I wish I was kidding). When this came on TV, I would run out of the room and go hide in my parents' room behind their bed. Whatever, this is terrifying. Shut your mouth.

I Can't Even Tell You How Funny This Is

We're back, nerds! Just kidding. We won't resume frequent posting until whenever Alex goes back to school, but I hope to at least keep this thing plodding along until then. Also, that was a joke because no one is reading this and no one is waiting for updates. I refuse to even believe that Lauren is reading at this point and she is like our one true constant. It's like the old saying goes: If you post on your brother-sister blog and La-duh-loo doesn't read it, does it...zzzzzz. Sorry, I fell asleep in the middle of my super lame new-fashioned proverb.
I just found something that I HAD to share with you guys, however few of you there may be! You've probably already seen this, but I hadn't. Comedian Elaine Carroll stars in this web series about the life of Mary-Kate Olsen. See you losers later, I have to go watch all of these in one sitting now.

Philip Zimbardo/Something Only I Care About

Ever since I was a small child, I've been interested in abnormal psychology. I used to read my dad's old college copy of a psychology textbook that probably wasn't terribly accurate, seeing as it was from the late 70's/early 80's. For a brief while, I even thought I wanted to be a psychologist. Then I figured out that psychologists actually had to learn things about science; they didn't just get to look at pictures of cats that schizophrenic people drew, which was what I was getting out of that textbook.
But oh man, did I love that textbook. It was written by Phillip Zimbardo (or else it just featured pictures of him, not sure!), who is famous not only for conducting the Stanford prison experiment, but also for looking kind of weird.

As a kid, I didn't know that Zimbardo was famous; I just thought he was a weird dude in an old book. Imagine my surprise when he showed up in my high school psychology studies as well as my college classes. Also once I saw him on The Daily Show, which was a super-weird surprise. My best friend and I always thought he kind of looked like Satan, or at least an actor who would be playing Satan in a made-for-TV movie.
Anyway, I found this video...the best of Philip Zimbardo.

This is worth watching. The part where he's holding the baby made me laugh AND cringe. ALSO, I found the pictures of cats that a schizophrenic man drew! You can see why I was drawn to them.

Book & Film Clubs

It's June 1st, which means we let the entirety of May go by without mentioning our Book & Film Club picks. You were probably so worried! Well, you didn't have to be, because Book Club solidered on (this is a joke, later it will makes sense, I promise)and Film Club kind of limped along sadly.
Our May pick for Book Club was The Barracks Thief by Tobias "Toby" Wolff.

It made me cringe a lot, and it made me sad, and I read it in the course of one night. I had a difficult time picking something for Film Club, so we are going to double up when Alex comes home and watch two month's worth of films in one month. I ended up choosing Douglas Sirk's Magnificent Obsession, which begins the way I like all my movies to begin...with a magnificent speed boat crash. Yeah, I'm making Alex watch this.

This is basically how Film Club will go from now on. Alex will pick something intelligent, and I will pick a film that features lines like, "I didn't ask for your resuscitator!"
And Book Club for this month is a doozie. Something I've wanted to read for a long time...

East of Eden! This breaks the only rule of TTWF Book Club, which is NO OPRAH. We got close enough with our first pick. But oh well. Sometimes rules are meant to be broken. John Steinbeck agrees.

"Like my jacket?"- John Steinbeck

Go Kendra, Go Kendra, Go Kendra

By now, everyone knows Kendra Wilkinson has a sex tape. Unless you don't know who Kendra Wilkinson is because you don't have a mother who occasionally fell asleep to episodes of The Girls Next Door. That show was kind of hypnotizing, right? The girls' lives were whitewashed into some semblance of normalcy, making it really easy to forget that they were all living in that mansion in exchange for having sex with the same decrepit old man. Yet they looked like they were having fun! Kendra especially. So, sure, she has a sex tape out now, but you can find some way more interesting videos on Youtube. Like this one, which raises so many questions. Like, what is the intended audience for this video? It's not sexy or naked enough to compete with the wealth of porn on the internet. And it's not really informative enough to qualify as an instructional dance video. And WHY that song??

"Okay, that's it, I'm gonna show you some martial arts next!" -Kendra
Just for good measure:

Just a hint.

You know how that new J.J. Abrams movie is coming out, and people are trying to piece together what it is based on a bunch of little clues. Well, I've got a potential new project coming up this summer, and here is the first part of the puzzle. Try it. It's awesome!

Yuck.

In case you guys needed a reminder.

Katherine Heigl's still terrible.

Werner Time

I'll be honest (as usual, no frontin' allowed here). I didn't watch all of this yet, because, um, 18 minutes long. But I thought that some people (Alex) might not have seen it yet. Why doesn't Werner narrate everything? If his voice was in commercials, I would buy so much stuff.

Dupreenaissance

Robbie Dupree certainly has been in the news lately! Not that he's news to us; we've been jamming to Dupree's hit "Steal Away" for years, thanks to Papa Winfrey's smooth rock vinyl collection. You can see why we were attracted to this cover:

It just screams (or whispers) smooth! As you might remember, Alex has a notorious beef with Dupree over a little music licensing disagreement. Really, though, I think that the Robster was only the pawn in a WMG-orchestrated bad-business scheme.
The man's certainly been productive lately. Not only does he have a new album coming out, but Steal Away is featured on the MacGruber soundtrack, as well as the soundtrack of whatever that new artsy Jim Carrey movie is called. Jimmy Fallon, yacht-rock enthusiast, also took an interest in the greatness that is Steal Away, and Robbie Dupree performed on his show Friday night! It was really wonderful, not only because Jimmy's Michael-McDonald-inspired backing vocals seemed to be making the other backup singers laugh, but because Robbie Dupree was really great! It's such a disappointment to hear a singer once known for their falsetto strain to reach the notes that once came easily (Supertramp is a good example), but Robbie Dupree still sounded great, and he seemed like he was having a lot of fun. Also, duh, The Roots! Here's
the performance on Hulu. I can't stop watching it! Let the Dupreenaissance continue. Obviously I am really proud of that pun.

Awesome.

This guy is using his family to its full potential. I know you guys have seen the original, so I'm not even going to bother posting it. "I am, uh, crazy about the blonde." So good. His Family Ties intro is amazing as well.

Careless Whisper

This is pretty much my room every night. I have a roommate who happens to be Japanese, and one of his many eccentricities is whisper singing. I assume he's listening to music, but who knows. Anyway, it's kind of like he's trying to keep it down, but at the same time he just can't hold it in. It's the loudest whisper I've ever heard, and I get to hear it a lot. He's also taken to snapping his fingers a lot. Sometimes he'll just say one word really loud to his computer. He stomps his feet about 10 times before leaving the room. He laughs to himself a lot and claps his hands. He's constantly making noises like he just discovered a life changing secret. He eats Skittles out of a cup the way most people drink water. He only ever eats candy, and he does so loudly. What I'm trying to say is, you ain't never meant anyone like Yamaguchi.

While We're on the Subject...

Has a hipster band made a dance remix of this yet? I feel like that probably exists, somewhere.

You can't even imagine what I had to Google to find this

Okay, I'll just tell you. It was "90's children's show man with beard." Alternately, I could've just called my mother.
I think there's a 95% chance that Alex doesn't remember this at all, but when we were really little, we used to watch this show everyday. Actually, Alex thought this was our dad. It's called Fred Penner's Place and it's Canadian, but we must've seen it on Nick Jr. Between this, Muppet Babies, Sharon, Lois, and Bram, Mr. Roger's Neighborhood, and David the Gnome, it is a wonder that we ever went outside at all. Just seeing this makes me feel such a deep feeling of comfort! But maybe, like Little Alex, I'm just thinking of my dad. This doesn't start until about 40 seconds in.

I truly feel that people working on children's television shows are doing the Lord's work. And I would be remiss if I didn't note that Fred Penner had a lot of outfits!

Greenberg

I went and saw Greenberg tonight. When I purchased the ticket, the lady asked me, "Just one?" as if I were buying a single ticket to Dear John or something. I have wanted to see this movie for a while, mostly because of my casual interest with Noah Baumbach and my more than casual interest with Greta Gerwig. I was really feeling a movie tonight, so truthfully I would been pretty forgiving of just about anything I went and saw. That being said, Greenberg was pretty good.

I went into the movie with kind of low hopes. While I did want to see it, the trailers didn't really do anything for me. I thought the dialogue sounded kind of overly clever. I'd heard people, including Ben Stiller, compare it to a seventies movie, and I thought, "come on." Just because a film has a somewhat unlikeable protagonist doesn't mean you need to talk about Hal Ashby all the time. Then when the film started, I shut up because yeah, it did kind of remind me of a seventies movie. Greenberg reminded of that particular era of filmmaking not so much because of the (slight) narrative similarities, but because of technical factors. The editing, which was, thankfully, not interested in continuity of motion, and the opening credits of the film were nice and unexpected after seeing the trailer. I also enjoyed the use of the zoom, which is something that people are starting to use more, and I have to say, I fully support. Zoom it up, baby. The film looks really pretty, which is always good.

There was only one scene in the film that reminded me of what I expected from the trailer, and that was one of the worst parts of the trailer as well. The scene in which Roger Greenberg interacts with several younger partygoers and talks about how olllllllddddddd he is. This scene went on for a while, and was the only time that I thought Baumbach's dialogue really felt writerly and forced. However, this scene is followed by a really nice scene with Greenberg and his friend, Ivan. The interaction between Greenberg and Ivan was one of my favorite parts of the film. There was an appropriate amount of it, and it felt pretty authentic.

Now to the Gerwig stuff. Was she good? Yes. Did she get naked? Would you expect anything less from her? All jokes aside, the lady gets naked in nearly every movie she's in. Her character was interesting and wasn't too much of a pixie dream girl, which the trailer kind of implied. It was nice to see a strong independent lady up there, not looking for relationships and having casual sex. Good for you.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, Greenberg was enjoyable. Don't be put off by the trailer. It felt much more natural than I thought it would, and Ben Stiller does a great job of keeping his character believable. If you have really wanted to go see a movie, and it's a Monday night and you're alone, I can think of nothing better to do.

I wish there was an app to remove Will.I.Am from songs

Breaking Upwards

Like we say often (usually before posting something negative), we don't like to post negative things. I'd like to know your opinions on this, though. This movie looks bad, right?

Listen. I like Andrew Bujalski as much as the next white girl with an English degree, but I don't need another one of him, okay? One is enough!
That being said. I know I will end up seeing this movie, and I'll probably even like it. I want to talk about all the things I hate about this trailer ("Monogamy is hard, boo-hoo") but those are all the things I love about Woody Allen movies.
Alex is gonna hate this one.

Muscles

This was a really weird phase in Diana Ross's career.

Dan originally showed me this video, and he could point out every little eccentricity far better than I can. So, instead, here's the entirety of Wikipedia's description:
The single's music video featured Ross in bed dreaming of muscular men. In one scene she is shown floating through the air over a landscape which turns out to be a man's musclebound body.
Fun fact: this song was written by Michael Jackson.

Steff

My favorite television character Special Agent Dale Cooper once said, "Harry, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don't plan it. Don't wait for it. Just let it happen. It could be a new shirt at the men's store, a catnap in your office chair, or two cups of good, hot black coffee."
I live my life with this in mind. Usually I opt for hot black coffee over the shirt from the men's store, but sometimes my present to myself is something else entirely. Today, it's this video.

The cast put Pretty in Pink way above the rest of the 80's teen movie crop. From Harry Dean Stanton's tender bum of a dad to Andrew McCarthy's eye-twitching heart-throb to Jon Cryer's brilliant portrayal of the high school outcast I only wish I knew when I was 17, the casting choices were flawless. But H and I have our own favorite character; James Spader's Steff, who wears his shirt perpetually unbuttoned to the navel (sometimes not buttoned at all!) and saunters through the high school looking not a day over 35. We quote Steff a lot, but for some reason, no one else seems to appreciate him the way we do. When we saw PIP in a theatre, we were the only ones laughing at lines like, "What's her name, Eddie or something?" and "If we're gonna shoot, we've gotta shake it," and our personal favorite, "You're gonna be late, buddy." I'm glad this video exists, because it proves that someone else in the world appreciates the wonder and bitchiness that is Steff.

Elizabeth Taylor

This weekend my grandma asked me if I was going to get engaged for my birthday. This was my response:

Why, yes, I DO have a B.A. in Howling from the Elizabeth Taylor School of Denying Things.

This was funny.

The idea is pretty silly, but it was really well done! I mean, this seems like a trailer.

It's my birthday week, I post what I want

Apparently Alex is too busy for the blog now. "I'm in college. I'm writing and producing a hit TV show." - my impression of Alex. I guess it's up to me to keep the blog going, and I can't think of a better way to do that than...
Rod Stewart!
The video isn't embeddable, and you might not think it's worth clicking over to Youtube to watch, but it is. Prepare to be surprised by one of my favorite Rod songs. In this live performance, he flouts conventional sartorial wisdom by rockin' a jacket with horizontal stripes. Also, a sailor hat. At one point, an audience member THROWS A STRIPED SCARF (a scarf? really?) at him and he immediately puts it on. When you're Rod Stewart, your audience always knows to only throw color/pattern-coordinated accessories at you. He also showcases some great dance moves, like "removing a hat and then putting it back on" and "wrist-shaking." Do yourself a favor and check out the dancing lady at 3:52.

Lady Stuff

On a Winfrey Family Vacation a couple of years ago (which took place on/near a mountain and involved staying in a cabin, as do all Winfrey Family Vacations), Alex brought along a book called Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me. The book consisted of (mostly) humorous essays by comedians, writers, and comedy writers about, you guessed it, the things they learned from the women who dumped them. I brought along East of Eden, because I entertained foolish hopes of using the car time to work my way through a classic. I ended up not even opening East of Eden and instead reading Alex's book when he finished it. A lot of my favorite comedians were represented (notably, David Wain, whose contribution was among my favorites) and I enjoyed the book.
After I'd finished it, Alex asked if it was weird to read a whole book chronicling mens' relationships experiences (and it was all men...no lesbians allowed here!). Well, no. Actually, it wasn't weird, because welcome to the whole wide world of comedy, film, and literature. While I consciously and unconsciously seek out the work of female comedians, writers, and directors, there's no denying that even underground/independent art forms are predominantly male. Of course, this isn't really anyone's fault, and it isn't even inherently bad. Like I said, I really enjoyed Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me. But did I feel like the book was intended for me? Did I feel like I was in on the joke? No way. But that's okay.
When I read Julie Klausner's fantastic book I Don't Care About Your Band, I thought "Finally! It's Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me, but for women!" It was everything the other book had been: witty, smart, in turns hilarious and heartbreaking. But this time, I didn't feel like I was sitting in the corner watching everyone else have fun. Julie Klausner was a woman making astute pop-culture references and identifying with a Muppet. She was funny, and she didn't have to pretend to be a man in order to get a laugh.
All of this is one big rambling way of saying that Julie Klausner is on one of our favorite podcasts, The Sound of Young America. TSOYA has had interviews in the past with some of my favorite smart, funny ladies (Miranda July, Charlyne Yi, Sloane Crosley, Maria Bamford) as well as lots of smart, funny men. The best part of this interview is that Julie Klausner comes across as a very nice person, because as you know, Alex and I have a hard time liking a comedian if they seem mean-spirited. Julie Klausner also compares her book to Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me, saying, "I didn't dump you. You were terrible, and then you disappeared."
Truly a woman after my own heart.

Lots and Lots of Rocks

Based on that title, Alex knows what's coming.
When we were little, Alex absolutely loved the Olsen twins. They had this series of videos where they were detectives, or "super duper snoopers," to use their wording. They had an office in (I think) a treehouse, and their tagline was, "We'll solve any crime by dinnertime." Alex practically wore out the VHS. Each video was, like, 15% mystery, 15% weird acting, and 70% awesome songs. Alex reminded me of this song recently, and oh MAN is it bad/wonderful.

First off, who is their vocal coach? The Olsens were just children and cannot be held responsible for those heinous singing choices. Randy Jackson would say, "Yo yo yo dawg, for me for you, you took some liberties with the melody. Pitchy, dawg." And secondly, I feel terrible for the lady who played the librarian. She had to muster up a Tawny Kitaen-in-a-Whitesnake-video level of enthusiasm for a song about rocks written for children.
Also, while we're talkin' Olsens, this one is the jam.

The Vote is IN

Not funny!

Kerry and I recently heard Natasha Leggero on Doug Benson's I Love Movies (family fav!), and we came to a conclusion about her. She's annoying. She doesn't like hip hop music you guys, because she's my mom. I'd heard a lot about her before, and I think I always just assumed she was cool because of the people she's associated with, but I was wrong. I don't want to say that she's popular because of her looks, but... Also, can you really be funny and be that well dressed? I get every feeling from her that she thinks she's better than everyone. Ugh, you guys, popular music is soo bad. Blah blah blah, Natasha Leggero. You've made a powerful enemy.

For Some Reason

this made me laugh. Clearly that guy is having a great time. I think this is actually the official video.

Book Club: Snow Angels

Our Book Club pick for April was Snow Angels by Stewart O'Nan. Perhaps not a seasonally appropriate choice, but still one that I was very happy with. Out of all the books we've (or I've) read for Book Club, this one is the easiest to recommend, but also the most depressing. Sure, The Moviegoer was depressing, but in a way that's hard to verbalize. For me, while I enjoyed The Moviegoer, the language got in the way of a visceral connection. With Snow Angels, the language (I almost typed "prose," but I'm not in an English program anymore. I don't have to use that word anymore! Barf) was unobtrusive and simple, bringing the devastation of the story to the forefront.
Snow Angels deals with two plots, one focusing on a fourteen-year-old boy, Arthur, and the other on his former babysitter, Annie, and her husband, Glenn. One of these stories is far more tragic than the other, and it's a real credit to O'Nan as an author that he's able to make us care just as deeply about the more trivial story.
What made this novel stand out so much for me was O'Nan's attention to the little high-school details; the indignities of riding the bus, the marching band director trying in vain to extract some kind of greatness out of a bunch of bumbling kids, and most importantly, the real selfishness of 14 year old kids. I'm pretty sure Little Alex never went through a phase like that, but most kids, myself included, did. In one scene, Arthur's parents are arguing in the next room as he prepares for a date, and he thinks, "I wasn't going to let anything ruin my happiness." Well, yeah. That's being 14.
So in a way, sure, this is a book about "growing up," but it's a lot more than that, too. The last paragraph is one of the most quietly crushing passages I've ever read. Highly recommended, you guys! You'll go O'Nanners for O'Nan (sorry).

Crazy excited.

I've been listening to this song a lot lately. The video is pretty nice too. Mostly I just wanted to say how excited I am to see George Saunders this week. I think that will be one of the few things I've ever done that is actually worth blogging about.

PS

Book club selection TBA. Hold your pants on.