Hannah Takes the Stairs

This weekend H. and I watched Hannah Takes the Stairs, renamed Hannah Who Cares? by Alex. It's yet another entry in the unfortunately-named genre known as mumblecore (ugh, who writes this stuff?). Greta Gerwig plays the titular Hannah, and she's pretty titular if you know what I mean (I'm trying to awkwardly say she is always taking her top off). I was surprised at how much weird, non-necessary nudity was in this movie. Not that I was offended, because who cares, but the movie began with a shower scene and ended with a bathtub scene (I get what you're doing there, Swanberg).
The actual movie itself was really boring, which is hardly a damning critique coming from me. I've been known to enjoy a boring movie in my time, and I enjoyed this one well enough. Mostly I was just frustrated though. A lot of filmmakers are involved in this movie--Andrew Bujalski (weird dude of my dreams), a Duplass Bro., Todd Rohal--but I really can't figure out how so many people could work on a movie with so little going on. The plot is pretty much this: Hannah breaks up with her boyfriend, starts dating another guy, sleeps with his best friend, ends the movie playing the trumpet in a bathtub with said dude. Which is fine. Whatever. Great movies have consisted of less. I guess what turns me off so much is the air of importance that this movie has. Like Hannah's quest for happiness is so noble or unique, when we all know that it's not. Near the end of the film she has this insufferable conversation with one of her coworkers (right before they have sex, natch) where she tells him that she feels bad because she's just "using him" to make herself feel better, but he's a real person with problems and she shouldn't just turn to him for an unburdened good time! Welcome to Things We All Figured Out When We Were Twelve.
And, honestly, I can't get behind any character who would dump not just a Duplass Bro. but Andrew Bujalski (who just can't catch/write himself a break). She's tossing aside independent filmmakers like they're her clothing or something. We should all be so lucky. H. was not at all impressed by Andrew Bujalski, but I've always found him quite charming! I know he's kind of funny looking (and he has very hairy legs, as we find out) but he always comes across as sweetly vulnerable and nice.

I'm just saying. I know which one I'd pick.
There were a lot of things I didn't like about this movie, but I'm glad it exists. It's nice that someone can make a low-budget movie in a month with their friends and then have that movie shown all over the world. More people should do that! I just hope they're, you know, a little more interesting.

Carrie Brownstein, Y'all

It certainly has been a day, today, hasn't it? So let's focus on something to make us all happy. You probably saw this trailer on Videogum, or maybe you just read the post and didn't watch the trailer. Well, you should watch it!
Some Days Are Better Than Others
Obviously, that's Carrie Brownstein. Okay, that's enough for me! The movie will be great. I've mentioned my love of Carrie Brownstein before, but I don't know if I've emphasized how MUCH I love her. She does it all. She acts in comedy sketches with Fred Armisen. She writes a blog about music for NPR and appears on All Songs Considered sometimes. She was in a great band (Sleater-Kinney, duh!) that I got to see on their very last tour ever (before you start thinking I'm way cooler than I am, I really just went because my friends did. I enjoyed myself immensely, but I'm not going to front and act like it was my idea to see them. The first rule of The Talented Winfrey Family is no frontin'), she's writing a book of non-fiction, and she always manages to look super great and have amazing clothes. I want to be her so badly.
I have a feeling people are going to bitch about this trailer. Sure, there are some surface similarities to Miranda July's Me and You and Everyone We Know, but who cares? Also, we haven't seen this movie yet. Who knows what it's like? I have enough faith in Carrie Brownstein to assume that this movie will be great.
Also, I'm pretty sure at least one of the dogs in the trailer is her actual dog.
Oh yeah, and if you still don't believe me that this movie will be awesome, just take a look at thispicture. Sweet room, yellow sweatervest, and possibly crafting (what is that giant stuffed thing?). I'm gonna drive all the way to Cleveland (or Columbus, or Athens!) to see this movie.

Celebrity Crush: Norm MacDonald

The premise of this new thing I'm starting is simple: post your celebrity crushes! One crush at a time, until we run out of crushes (we will never run out of crushes. I can keep this going forever, y'all). Crushes of either gender are fine, whatever, we don't discriminate around here. Just keep it dreamy.
To start us off, I decided to go back to the O.G. of my inappropriate celebrity crushes. I mean, all of my crushes are inappropriate and creepy, but this one especially so. I'll tell you why: I was super, super in love with Norm MacDonald when I was 14. I had his picture in my locker when I was in the eighth grade. That seems so weird to me now, but oh well. Other girls liked The Backstreet Boys, I liked comedians in their 40s (I still liked The Backstreet Boys, but more in a sad, trying-to-fit-in way). Here he is: dreamboat!

I decided to use that picture where he looks younger and kind of rockabilly so I wouldn't feel so creepy. It's pretty easy to see why Norm MacDonald is a Celebrity Crush. He's the funniest, duh. But really the reason we all have a crush on him is because he is so good at Million Dollar Password.